photo from : http://www.geekalerts.com/x-lamp/ It’s easy to get over people but it’s hard to forget them. Ex-friends, Ex-flings, Ex-partners, Ex-lovers. Whatever you call them and how ever you categorize them, they all start with the same prefix: Ex.

Maybe it’s the -ber season that’s making me feel this way. On cold months, I can’t help but think of people who became a part of my life but now aren’t. Nostalgia? Maybe. So here I am, at the farthest corner of our office floor with nothing to do but recall the now-gone people in my life.

Friends, while most people are looking for ways to keep them,  I find myself (on more than one occasion) wondering how I can have my long-lost friends back.   Careers, finances and what-nots are always in the way of friends. If you’re not alert enough, you’ll wake up one morning realizing that your filled friend’s bucket are now half empty.  Lucky, if you’re able to get them back, bad if you can’t.

Signing up on different social networks  made me reconnect with people I haven’t seen or spoken with for a very long time, people whom I’ve had  great friendships with before. It was an all time high to see that after several years, they seem to be doing well. Notes are sent, phone numbers exchanged and text messages received. Most of the time it ends there. With busy schedules and numerous commitments, you’d find it really hard to even meet up for a cup of coffee. Puff.  Reconnection? Sometimes you’re just an added number on their growing friend’s list.

Partners, Flings and Lovers- the shadows of my past. I’ve always made it a point to be friends with my ex’s. Just because I can’t be in a relationship with them doesn’t mean we can’t be friends right? So, breaking up for me has always been like putting that person on another group, the friends only category. Sometimes though, there comes a point where no matter how much both of you try to keep the friendship, it’s just not possible. When this happens, I feel like I’ve lost 2 people : a lover and a friend. (*clap! clap! this entry is filled with cliché)

Relationships. When you’re in one, you’d think you have the perfect relationship until it ends. You go to great lengths to keep the relationship only to go again to great lengths to forget it…and soon comes a new one. The cycle goes on and you never quit. The number of  ex-lovers/ ex-flings you have shows how deep you are into the cycle. We’re all looking for someone who’d make us stop searching- as if there really is somebody like that.  A perfect relationship is fiction. Somewhere in our search, we just sort of decide to settle and make-believe that we’ve finally found that relationship we’re looking for. I’ve settled (or I think I did) many times but I always see something different or lacking. These are usually things of the past.  I feel bad about it, but I realized it’s normal. You can’t get everything you want. Sometimes, you have to let go of somethings to make room for new things. Out with the old, in with the new.

Ex’s, whatever purpose they serve in your life,  are parts of who you are. There’s nothing wrong to go down on memory lane once in a while. They measure how far you’ve gone and how much you’ve changed.

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